Friday, February 25, 2011

Parenting the broken

So thankful that The Father holds us in his hands never to let go........

  I fold laundry and the tape of a broken past plays in my head.  I go to sleep at night and the dreams are there.  Why not dreams of beaches and fun times.  Only with God's healing of our minds can we move past the broken beginnings.  It is hard, pray for the forgivenss to take place.  I guess it is little piece by little pieces at time.  A life time process, possiblely not even completed in old age, maybe not in this life time, but healing in eternity.

   I guess this is why I am drawn to parenting the broken.  We chip away little pieces to get to know her.  It is a process of two steps forward and one back.   Sneha's thoughts are locked away in her mind and a voice that will not respond to let them out.  We will probably not ever know what happened and why she shuts us out.  I do know that she is safe now and will never endure what happened in the past.  Give us patience to give her time to unlock herself.  Give us understanding that all things happen in God's timing and that is not our time......She is starting to learn that we will not leave her alone and we will always be there to help.  How could someone ever forget their mother walking about in train station that is loud, dirty, so crowded, and then she didn't ever come back.  Not ever to return, turned her back and walked a way.  It is easy to speculate maybe she was sick and strarving and knew that the police would find a place for Sneha.  Probably a better place than she could provide, maybe her mother was homeless?  At least the train station was safe from the dogs and critters out in the open.   Sneha has scars on her cheeks like she layed on lots of gravel or dirt when she was little. 

    Elijah is beginning to unlock his heart to us.  I can't imagine the feeling of being left on a street in the "Wuhan" district of a city of 6. 1 million  people.  Then he was in the hospital for the first month of his life after and interrcranial bleed which caused a stroke.  Then he went to the orphange for a short while and in the mean time they matched him with a loving foster family in the village of Anning in the mountains by Kunming.  He lived with this family until 2 weeks before we came to adopt him.  He then transition for 2 weeks in the orphange.  Then we came to adopt him and he had never even seen blue eyed people.  His world has been rocked many times in his short life.  I am very thankful that with love and prayer his life is being redeemed.  His attitude is surprisingly positive and he is such a hard workers.  I think he is realizing that we are forever never to leave him.

Psalms 107 1-3

1 Give thanks to the LORD, for he is good; his love endures forever. 2 Let the redeemed of the LORD tell their story— those he redeemed from the hand of the foe, 3 those he gathered from the lands, from east and west, from north and south.


Tuesday, February 22, 2011

Tuesday February 22, 2011

Proverbs 23:10-12

Do not move an ancient boundary stone or encroach on the fields of the fatherless,  for their Defender is strong; he will take up their case against you.  Apply your heart to instruction and your ears to words of knowledge.

So thankful for my four blessings from Heaven

Thankful for two boys

Thankful for two girls

Thankful that God moved mountains to save these two from across the world.

I am feeling so full of doubt and overwhelmed by the responsibilities of everyday life.  I know that all I have to be concerned with is one day at a time.  God brought Elijah and Sneha home to us in the midst of two job layoffs, surgeries, selling a home, buying a home, and moving towns.  I am so full of fear that we have another lay off or have to move again.  I can  handle the loss of moving, but it is so hard for children to start over in school and with friends.   Stepping out in faith has separated us from many and it can be a very lonely place.  As we read the Bible we learn and see that this is what happens, but it doesn't make it any less difficult.  Some times I wake up and wonder why I am here and how  did we end up this way. Most days I have confidence, but that doubt creeps up.  When I look at the big picture I wouldn't change the recent choices that we have made.I feel guilty for not taking a trip to see my brother and his family and I miss them so much.  I know that lives do not depend on that vacation and lives could change with our trip to India.  Funds are tight and we do not have money for both.  I know this life is not about our comfort, but sometimes I feel a pity party creeping up.  I love Oregon and the coast and I just need to know that it is right to go India and use all of our vacation money.  I pray the children will understand the eternal importance, not just the day to day.

Luke 12:6-8 (NIV)

 Are not five sparrows sold for two pennies? Yet not one of them is forgotten by God.  Indeed, the very hairs of your head are all numbered. Don’t be afraid; you are worth more than many sparrows.  “I tell you, whoever publicly acknowledges me before others, the Son of Man will also acknowledge before the angels of God.

I just need to remember the promises from the Bible. I need to live each day as if it is my last  and pray for faith the size of a mustard seed.  If our Father in Heaven wants Joy to come home it will happen.  If I am to go to India it will happen.  End of story it is all in God's hands!!!

Thursday, February 17, 2011

Third year with Elijah in our family!!!!!

John 14:18

I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.

It is so hard to believe that three years ago today we met our son Elijah Chongli aka Wu, Chong Li.  Our times in China were exciting as well as very trying.  He had never seen blue eyed people and our eyes scared him.  He had lived with a wonderful foster family since he was an infant so two weeks before our arrival he went back to the orphanage to prepare for his new family.  His world had been turned upside down and he was grieving the life and family that he lost.  He tried to run away from us constantly.  At six years of age his heart was broken, but I can saying that he is finally mending and he is becoming happier and more secure in his new life.  A different boy today than three years ago. 

Elijah has accomplished so much in three years. 
1.He has learned English and now is at a 3rd grade reading level-no more ESL
2.He is learning about the Bible and how it impact on  every aspect of life
3.Learning to embrace a life of opportunity in America
4. He has recovered from major skull reconstruction surgery,been without seizure meds for 6 months, and is in the process of recovery from hand surgery.
5.Learning that he is not alone in his special needs-CP and  massive stroke as an infant and that there  are others in the world with similar needs and they are successful people.  He has been able to meet children with similar needs at Shriner's Hospital
6.He is learning to trust that we are his forever family and we will stick by and love him in the good and bad.

We love you Elijah and are so thankful that God brought you into our lives!!!!

Psalm 68:6

God sets the lonely in families, he leads out the prisoners with singing; but the rebellious live in a sun-scorched land.

Friday, February 11, 2011

Productive Week

I am watching and waiting......

ACTS 2:17-21

17 “‘In the last days, God says,

I will pour out my Spirit on all people.

Your sons and daughters will prophesy,

your young men will see visions,

your old men will dream dreams.

18 Even on my servants, both men and women,

I will pour out my Spirit in those days,

and they will prophesy.

19 I will show wonders in the heavens above

and signs on the earth below,

blood and fire and billows of smoke.

20 The sun will be turned to darkness

and the moon to blood

before the coming of the great and glorious day of the Lord.

21 And everyone who calls

on the name of the Lord will be saved.’
Wow this week is almost over.

Monday-Salt Lake City with Elijah for the first post surgical check up.  Not the immediate out come that we had hoped for.  He is in a hand brace for a month to stretch the hand and thumb and it is starting to look better.  We will go to Salt Lake monthly until they are satisfied with the outcome.  A very trying day for Elijah who was expecting a radical change.

Tuesday-I finally sent my visa application to hopefully go back to India in April.  I forgot how time consuming and complicated to sent "official" mail.

Wednesday-Taxes sent off to accountant.  We are praying for a large adoption tax credit refund to assist us with our Ghana adoption.

Thursday-Where did the housekeeper go, I just can't seem to find her?  Oh the is right that is me.  The house is finally clean and wood floors polished.  My house where there are two parents, four kids, and three dogs=lots of messes and clean up for mom.

Friday- One more day off before my work week starts tomorrow.  After being sick and in bed for days last week I needed a week to catch up.  I am very thankful to have a job that works so well with four children..

On the travel fronts we are preparing our hearts and minds for the up coming trip to India.  I am very excited, but also apprehensive, a whole different world where nothing is the same as home.    I am praying for miracles out of ACTS to happen in couple of months across the world on a mountain top.  I know that miracle exist in this day and age.  We just need to step out to see them.  They usually happen when we are not in our own strength, but in HIS.  Once a person sees the power of God come alive you will go to the ends of the earth to see it again and again.

WE are approved to adopt from Ghana.  Now we need a plan to make it happen.  Our plan to rely upon God for every step making the miracles from above visible for all to see.  Our Father will move mountains to place the orphan in families we just need to wait and watch his plan.
Luke 17:6

He replied, “If you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mulberry tree, ‘Be uprooted and planted in the sea,’ and it will obey you.

Tuesday, February 1, 2011

Word to define our year---FAITH

Psalm 36:5

Your love, LORD, reaches to the heavens, your faithfulness to the skies.

     My  word of the year is FAITH.  If I could just have a little faith in all the unknowns in our lives.  I have to admit it is very difficult.  Why can't I trust?  Human nature and it's doubtfulness!  I have a constant battle in my head, should we step out in FAITH and wait to see or should we stay in a relatively  "safe" place.  God is in control of every thing any way so why do we crave control?  We are not in control ever not even on the best day.

     Medical testing and waiting is not in our control.   So many ifs, ands, or buts and worrying brings us nothing.  Thinking and rethinking if a Ghana adoption is going to happen or not?  Then there is India!!!
A trip that brings many apprehensions and unsettled thoughts.  I know that I am to travel there again, but I need to prepare my heart and mind.  I am praying for big things to happen.  I am expecting a true MIRACLE to unfold in India while we are there.  I am not longer content with so so. I know that our FATHER in HEAVEN performs miracles and I want to witness a true revival and awakening in the people of India.  Are my hopes too high, maybe, but I want to have faith and know that it is possible.  I just need to remember each and every miracle that happened in the process to bring Elijah and Sneha home.

.Psalm 33:4

For the word of the LORD is right and true; he is faithful in all he does.